Sunday, July 30, 2006

Dunno why, but i've been down on my luck lately... Went out yesterday with my family. My dad wanted to do some adjustments to my mom's, mine and his phone plans. I was using M1, my dad M1 and Starhub, and my mom Singtel. Apparently, M1 and Singtel's bills were unusually high(me and my mom didn't use the hp that much k...), and its been like this for quite some time already. So my dad wanted to go terminate Singtel's and his M1 line. I was like thinking, "hmmn...maybe i could get that Nokia 3250 that i've been hoping for..." Of course, it was wishful thinking of me... We first went to da M1 shop at the Paragon. Didn't get a good deal there, of course. Dang man, while i was there, i saw a lot of girls in their 20s... Holy crap man, i just wished that i can just get out of that place ASAP!!! The whole Orchard Road is FILLED them, and the more i look, the more sad and guilty i felt(I am NOT gay!!!)... I just kept feeling that my whole life is summarised in 3 letters : F, S, U, which stands for Fat, Stupid and Ugly... Yup... Haiz, i just don't have kinda zest for life like the rest of my frens... Something BIG is missing in my life, and one part of me says its... well... nvm, pple who know me should know what it is...

After M1, we went to Plaza Singapura to go to Starhub, and we terminated the Singtel line on the way in the car... Also, i told my dad that i needed a new sports shoe; my current is in very bad shape now... When i got out of the carpark, guess what... I saw more of them... Dang-it man... I just wanna find a hole and hide in there for the rest of the day... To make it worse, we had to wait 1 HOUR for our turn at the counter for Starhub! My queue was 0094 and i got it when da number was 0081; half an hour later it was only 0084. Wadde heck man, 1 number every 10 mins? We then thought, forget it man. Come some other day... We then went for dinner, then went to World of Sports to see some shoes. Skipping some details, i went home without any 3250 or shoe cos apparently "i had no say in what was to be bought". Ok lol, 'you' win, since you're the one with the money. Don't wanna waste my energy arguing with you.

That night wasn't a good night. I spent like 1.5 hour jus sitting on my bed and thinking about how dumb i am, how unlucky i am and how i wish reject reality and substitute my own...

Then came this morning. Woke up earlier than expected... I can tell you this: weekend mornings with my dad ain't a nice thing. He just kept wanting me to do things he want when i didnt want to. I just HATE it when pple do that to me. He then gave up and went to the gym on his own, but he came back with a box of new sports shoes, left it at the door, had lunch, then went out to see his frens again. I really hoped that it would be mine, but experience tells me that he ain't that loving and caring. So i half-heartedly just wished it would be mine. And so the day went on with homework. True enough, when he came back at night(which was lyk 30 mins ago), my mom asked whose shoes were those; he said he bought it for himself for jogging. One half of my consciousness was like telling the other: "Hahaha. You see? Told you so. BlehzZz..." What's worse is that i just realised i still had chemistry worksheets, differenciation/integration worksheet, social studies SBQ and history SBQ undone. Alrightey then. What a 'beautiful' day it is today... Now i REALLY wish that i wasn't living at all. Let me be in Isreal now please, and let Lebanon bomb me...


faux.fire burned out at
9:47 PM




terry . nineTEEN . 23o8'1990 .
virgo. faux.fire
chs 4-10 '06 . ajc 15/07 .
chs chinese orchestra .
ajc guitar ensemble .

reasons for living;
guitar . bio . friends . fantasy . wind .
GOOD FOOD . mangoes & longan .

ADDICTED on/to -
linkin park . BoA . mayday . yui .
jap food . final fantasy VII .

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endless connections +
CHS 4-10 06'
Jun Yang / Nick / Jing Cheng / Kelvin C. /
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Melissa /

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Noah / Uzzy / Teng Wee / Amanda / Lincoln /
Elaine S. / Geena / Elizabeth /

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